aeribaby --- and suicide

lol well this was an unexpected post because i have alot of work to do and i didnt think i would have time to post but wth haha....anyways to kittys post about crying and smiling haha i agree with that....butone wierd think i do is if im really sad/mad or feel like crying or even when i did cry i would smile i would force myself to smile  because that showd me that theres no reason to get upset or mad thats why i never cry anymore or it seems like i dont care about nothing...because in the end does it matter?  no   lol   people could have the worst day ever and everything could go wrong but the next day you could be fine?   so was it worth it to waste your whole day crying hit stuff and crap like that no it wasnt  think backs to days that you were really mad and stuff you said haha doesnt that seems stupid now?    people who kill themselves is really stupid to me and i dont feel sorry for them people that talk about commiting suicide or tell me there going to i say go ahead not because im mean but because think about it first?   if oyu want to commit suicide obviosly your upset? and youve had alot of struggles   yes we get that but alot of people have thos same struggles  im one of those people that have went through alot and stuff i havnt told anyone and ive been at the suicide point
                but anyways if you want to kill yourself think about it think about all the stuff youve been through  all the life youve lived so far and all the struggles youve gotten through why kill yourself now? doesnt that seem like the biggest waste ever? ya i hate wasting time i want everything done now and my way..so killing yourself is stupid yes i understand the whole wats the point  of life because we all end up dying int the end ya but mabye good stuff will come through your life mabye itll be good...because 98% of the time it does turn out good except for the few people that choose to stay sad...life doesnt suck you choose to hate everything and not do anything to better yourself and thats your own damn fault so get of your lazy emotional ass and do something productive....  so anyways if youve lived this much life yuo might as will live for longer and see whats your life turns into ive known alot of people that have killed themselves and that hve died from there own fault and i think there stupid and i dont think or care about them now becasue most kill themselves because they think no one cares and they say "theyl care once im gone" ya mabye for a couple months but life moves on...so is that worth it no   and ive never cried at one funeral   so anyways just think about your life shit happens but shit also changes so you might be sad today but itll get better i promise lol